My dad just past away last July. We knew mom was suffering from dementia prior to dad's death. My dad told me on occassions that he knew mom was getting worse and he shared his concern with me regularly. My wife and I moved from a job 300 miles away to be closer to both of them prior to dad's death. Now mom's dementia is getting worse. She was seeing a doctor who prescribed medication for dementia but mom didn't like the side effects so she stopped taking them. Now my wife and I check on her daily (in person), keep her involved in church and other events around town, and take her out to eat at least twice a week. She likes to work in the yard and do house work. Physically she is in good shape. It's the progression of the dementia that scares me. I want to take care of her the best way I know how. My main concern and nightmare is when the day comes that she needs assisted living. When she does what ever it is that makes us not able to trust her alone anymore, either it be something she does that is dangerous or walks away and gets lost. All this being said my question is, when do you have to take away the privilage of staying "HOME ALONE"?
I am sorry about the loss of your father. It is good that you moved closer and were able to be with him prior to his death.
I am glad your mother is physically healthy and is still able to work in her yard and do housework. You mentioned that her dementia is getting worse but didn't say how she is changing.
Safety issues associated with her living alone include the monitoring of medications, the risk of a fire caused by turning on the stove and forgeting about it and the risk of her wandering off. Making her overall environment safe by removing throw rugs and clutter and installing grab bars in the bath is important also. I would suggest that you continue to monitor your mother's level of functioning as you have been. In the meantime I would suggest that you learn about local resources and plan ahead for her ongoing care. There are legal, medical and financial matters to be addressed. Your local chapter can help you with this planning. They can be contacted through the "Find Us Anywhere" link on our homepage.
If you would like to discuss this issue with one of our Care Consultants you can reach us on our 24-hour helpline at: 800-272-3900.
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I understand exactly where you are comming from. It is truely hard. My mom did not want to move, and did not want strangers coming into her house. I knew it was time to force her to move when I found my self hoping that the "minor" diaster would be a small stroke, or being brought home by the police.When I understood that I was hoping my mom would have a stroke , it was time and past time for the move.
