My mother supposedly has Alzheimer's but my parents are very secretive and don't want to talk about the situation. Attempts to get a dialogue going result in much aggitation on her part, and directed to me since I try to discuss. Brother and I are having trouble dealing with the "must wait until something happens" situation we are in. Want to help, but not allowed to do so. Mother is 74, Father is 79 and not in good health but doing all the caregiving. Advice?

Dawn, thanks for joining our community. This particular forum doesn't get much traffic, so please consider re-posting on a highly trafficked forum, like "Caregivers."

Are your parents nearby? Take them cookies, and other treats, and don't bring up the Alzheimer's. Just love them, be with them, show your love, and they'll talk to you when they're able.

Hi Dawn

Patience is the answer my friend..with yourself..and your parents..

our parents and their generation..do not always share..their feelings about illness..

may you give your parents..time to adjust ..to their feelings..and how they.. choose to cope with the fact you mom has alzheimers..

you dad needs your support..may you Let him..decide what is best at this time..who to tell..and when to tell them..

may you be there for them..and be a good listener..when your dad needs to talk..and then offer to do whatever your dad..needs help with...Love Rosie

Dear Rosie, I know how your parent feel. I was so shocked when my hubby became ill that I slunk around all the time. You have had wonderful advice, just love them and bring cookies. As time passes they will accept this more. Hopefully they are able to take the durgs. Hugs.