My 79 year old mother with dementia has been in particularly bad stae of perseveration, paranoia, fear etc... She starts when she gets up and continues repeating the same frustrations, fears and threats over and over. She needs to get to a doctor but refuses to go. We want to try to find a doctor who will come to the home and exam her, perscribe some medication to chill her a bit so we can try to help her etc etc.. I am sure you know the drill. Is there anyone from Long Island, (we are in Glen Cove), that knows some doctors who might help us with this. I have contacted the local alz.org and am still waiting to hear from them. Her doctor is of little help and we are looking foranother, butin the mean time things are going from bad to worse.

Dear Rosemarys daughter,
I don't know the laws in Long Island but here you can call 911 and have her brought to the emergency room and have her evaluated. Sometimes it takes up to 48 hours, however, you may want her to be checked medically b4 you go in the other direction. There are many physical problems that cause the symptoms you talked about.

Hope this helps

Peace and Hope,

Thanks We have considered 911 but do not want to tramatize her further. We have been following leads to no avail today.Doctors on call programs etc...So the plea is still out there if anyone has any ideas. I know doctors don't usually make house calls, but it seems for paranoid people with dementia and alzheimers , you would think someone would do it.

Hi Rose, for a lot of years I was a psychotherapist doing a lot of evaluations, including many on seniors. For many reasons, I have to agree with Lisa. It's extremely unlikely a doctor would be able to leave his/her job to see your mom, they're booked solid months in advance, and would lose money if they tried many home visits. Here in Colorado, the system is that you have to get your loved one to the doctor.

Have you called her insurance? There are ride services less extreme than an ambulance that AMR and similar companies use for occasions like this, that the insuror might contract with. Or, perhaps they'd pay for a nurse to make a home visit, and get things started that way.

Seconding Lisa again, it's imperative that their be a basic medical workup on her, it's very possible she has a UTI or some such thing that's escalating her.

If you have to go the 911 route, you just have to weigh her ongoing distress against the confusion of an ambulance ride.

I'm so sorry that modern medicine is so cold and inflexible. In my youth, doctors would visit a home. Not now, it's a different world.

Let us know what happens!

Rose;

Keep looking. I had the same problem. I couldn't get the Diva (Mom) to MD. I eventually found one. Came to the house. Actually, this is her 2nd MD that makes house calls. When I thought her wrist was broken, they even have mobile Xray. Came took all the pix they needed. Don't give up, try contacting some home health agencies. They may have MD on staff.

Blessings!

Thanks everyone for the info. Now that I am back home here in Vermont, I can take the time to back up a bit. This was my firsrt time posting. I have been browsing a bit, but this incicdent really put us to the test. We did eventually find a doctors on call organization, but you have to be a member and we are not yet sure about making that kind of commitment. We actually got their emergency contact number, and were told to call back in the morning to registar, then the lady hung up and I never did get the number I needed to call.

In all of this we did discover that removing ourselves from her presence will calm her down. Unfortunately my brother lives there, so when he gets up to go to work at 6a.m. she starts in on him and then again when he returns at night. He has it the worst. Also there is a tenant upstairs who hears all of it as well. She has been there a long time, gets along with my mom and looks in on her, but this is something she should not have to put up with.

Anyway, my mom was diagnosed with early onset dementia in 2002. In 2006, the doctor contacted my sister because he felt things had progressed to the point where family needed to be more aware and involved. He suggested then that she not drive. The driving thing has been a bone of contention between my siblings and myself. A friend found her a few weeks ago in the neighborhood, in her car, disoriented and unawre of how to get home. This was the last straw. We all told her that if she takes a driving test and they say she can drive, we'll abide by that. We all realize she is too confused and unable to set up the test and she refuses to let us arrange it ( we are all plotting against her and she can do it herself etc....LOL

This event seems to have caused some progression in the disease for her. She is in total denial about having it,( which she has always been)now thinks, we think she is crazy, she is paranoid, is embarrassed( my mother has always been about her image and what others think)and very very angry. Once she starts in she does not stop. She may walk away but is back in less than a minute to start in again. If I refuse to leave, she will eventually leave herself. She will start right in again when she returns.

We have tried twice now to get a caregiver in. She called the cops on the first one (two weeks ago when came on her own the second day. I went with caregiver #2 the other day and tried to work it slowly and casually, but she was just hysterical. The caregiver is willing tocome back and try it agin once she is sedated.

Here comes the interesting part. It has been 2 years since she has seen her doctor or any doctor. She thinks she is in good health and refuses to go when we make appointments, cancels appointmnents she sometimes thinks to make etc... Meanwhile this same docotr has been prescibing her an anti-depressant continually. This is the only medication she takes ( and not regularly I am sure) This doctor's office also did not return our relentless phone calls to get some immediate help for my mom. When they finally returned a call they told us that since she hadn't been to see him in two years, they did not consider her their patient. I plan to report him to the powers that be. That is nuts.

We have set up an appointment for the beginning of May. Now we have to figure a way to get her there!!!!

Thats it in a nutshell.

Thanks!! Joan (Rosemary's daughter)

I just went to a caregiver's seminar and they talked about a visting doctors association. They made it sound like it was nationwide. I had no idea this was even available. It sounded wonderful.

I will see what I can find out, (my mother took all the info from the semimar) but in the meantime, call your local senior center or Office of Aging for assistance. They should no if this service is available in your area.

Rosemary's Daughter: Don't know if it'll be too expensive, but found New York House Call Physicians (866) 657-7941 with board-certified physicians who make house calls in NYC and Long Island. They're called New York House Call Physicians and they're at 20 Park Av., ste 1A at 35 st, 10016. You can see the website at doctorinthefamily.reachlocal.com. I found it by googling "doctors on call" and inserting "Glen Cove."

Good luck.

The other choice is to try to get a visiting nurse, the nurse could evaluate her and get an MD to rx for her. When she is a bit calmer, ( or sedated) she does need to go for a good evaluation.

There are agencies called "home health care agencies". Your Mom's doctor could write an order for the visiting nurse from the agency to come and evaluate her. They can take blood and urine samples. Get the vital statistics and check for diabetes, etc. in her home. When the doctor receives the results of the evaluations and lab work, it is possible that he or she could make recommendations to help her. This situation has worked out well for my Mom who is deathly afraid of doctors and hospitals, who is 79 years old and has advanced alzheimers. My prayers are with you and your Mom- may God grant her peace in her heart and calmness in her mind.

My father recently had a severe bout with constipation and gas.
Getting him into a doctors office was out of the question, he cannot walk ,is incontinent and can not sit for long periods do to pain in his tailbone.
We called an ambulance to transport to local hospital,requested only his doctor and was out in a couple of hours. Ambulance then transported him back home. Better than fighting for a close parking space, an available seat in the waiting room and having to stay in the bathroom the whole time. Medicare paid for transport to hospital and private insurance paid for transport back home. Just an idea

I am new to responding on in this setting so please forgive me if this response is unpleasant but it is my experience. I am now taking medication for dementia but two years ago I was a caregiver. My family member was much like your mom. Had never gone to dr except in emergieces. Never took any rx or meds. Isolated and hard to care for. Getting her to agree to go to a doctor was not going to happen. I found a psychiatrist (sp) to come to home through a friend of family and fairly unsuual. Preformed diagnostic there. Later it became clear that to care for her required a court decision. Many harts were broken and much anxiety among family. Through pain of it all the family had to go to court to get both legal and medical services. Even then the patient never took prescriptions. Six months later a major medical emergency required hospitalization. Emergency room treatment and overall services were, to me, brutal. She came home but passed within a week. Even with medical help, what there is of it, it is a coin toss about what will happen next. Thinking back Im not sure if a doctor would/could come to home (unless it was some rare doc or exception) without the expressed desire of the patient. My memory of that (well that is a laugh) we should have gotten power of attorney much sooner than we did. Hope this is of some help. MToddL