Just wanted to let you know I have made an appt. with a P.H.D. to help me try to come to terms with EOAD. I called the ALZ Assoc. they gave me a name of a Dr. who works with ALZ. I just can't deal with so many things and need to talk about it. I was always so in charge person. That person is gone and I don't know what to do. Has anyone else gone through this? Has seeing someone helped? I have started forgetting things more ofter, like I told my husband this morning I couldn't remember what I did yesterday and I sat and tried to remember and still can't remember. Usually it will come to me. I hope the sessions will help, just hope I can remember them, just a little humor. I am not in denial I think I am just mad, but I thought that was to pass and it hasn't. I can sit and talk about what is happening but I know the person I'm talking to doesn't have a clue. My husband tries so hard to understand. I know when I read what Lisa said about her friends saying that happens to me all the time. I have had that said to me also. I know people are trying to help, but if they only knew. I have started having problems finding the right word for something. I have always been a slang person with words, so that helps some. But, it scares me when this happens. I know what I want to say but can't find the right words. Will let you know how my session goes next week.

Sharon

Dear Sharon,
I have a lot of thoughts in my head right now about what you said but I have a hard time concentrating on one thought.

Here goes:
I had a therapist but I want to find someone who understands cognitive deficit from a disease standpoint, and not just that "forgetting is just a part of old age; don't worry about it." I needed reminding and cueing. I needed help staying focused and not allowing myself to be distracted. The AD books give examples of how caregivers can talk with dementia patients so as to enhance their remaining cognitive functions. For example, caregives should speak more directly, and less abstractly. The family members caution new caregivers about how to communicate with their LOs so as not to worsen their confusion. I need a therapist who is educated in dementia-speak, not just therapist talk. How to find an educated therapist?

I have decided to stop talking about my memory issues. I feel immediately demoralized when I hear people say, Oh, you're normal; or You don't have any problem; or even worse, You're having a pity-party. I need help. Comments like these seem to try to keep me from getting help.

Fortunately I have been well educated by coming to these message boards and absorbing the advice and guidance other patients and caregivers have to pass along. Reading the message boards and chatting, this is my therapy for the moment.

Sharon, do you have a goal of what you want to get out of therapy? Does your therapist work with dementia patients? Never mind, I see that the AZ Assoc gave you your referral. Good luck.

Iris L.

Sharon,
Getting some help is a great choice. You've made the decision and acted upon it. That's a great start.
I do know how you're feeling about the anger and the forgetting stuff. Sounds like you, also, having some serious anxiety?! If you were a control freak like me, I had lots of anger, fear and frustration especially in the first year which caused MORE anxiety. Anxiety is your enemy now. It makes things much worse. Try some slow, deep breathing and perhaps some meditation? Try to calm down. This may help, a little.
Then, get to a good therapist and some goos meds as well. Believe me, we need all the help we can get!

Good Luck. Hang in there. Please, let us know how it goes. We're here!!

Sharon, for us dementia folks, anxiety can cut our remaining brain power in half. I've found seeing a psychologist useful for trying to come to grips with what's happening, and to not be excessively afraid or angry about it.

I'm not always successful. And, I'm on a lot of medication that's supposed to help me, and I think it does. Most of the time.

Iris, I find that writing what I'm thinking can often - not always - help me focus. Not much else helps, usually. As for finding your best therapist, there's always trying your local Alzheimer's Association, see if they can recommend anyone. Maybe ask a big assisted living place who they'd recommend.

Lisa, you don't write like a control freak. You're not a wanna-be, are you? Maybe a groupie for the control freak band?

Oh Alan,
I had my times of wanting to control things. After my husband died, I wanted to control a lot of things. It's taken some time to realize that the best way to control things is to, sometimes, let them go.
I don't mean give up. I mean realizing that most of these things are out of our control anyway.
Groupie, perhaps, but most of the time I've been the leader of the band! lol.

Hey Sharon and All Alz Groupies (good term Lisa)

I too have been having a lot of anxiety attacks. At first, I thought they were heart attacks. Whew, thank god they weren't.

Sharon, I'm also waiting from my primary to let me know which psychologist to speak with. I know the feeling of having many thoughts going through your mind,(or at least what you can remember of them) but, also having others questioning your illness.

I live in West Virginia. On a national basis people who live in other states see a West Virginian as a hillbilly, with no education, no teeth, dirty, living in swallor and outhouses, not to mention, in-breeding. There's days you will be strong and days you can't. Next time somebody says something that upsets you, you can do one of two things: "educate them VERBALLY or WALK AWAY"! They're probably not worth your breath to waste on them in the first place.

We all love you and I think if it were physically possible we'd all have a group hug just because....
M

Sharon

FYI--Alan is right you burn up too much brain power with anxiety attacks. I've had these the past 3-days. Today I feel about half normal (whatever that is)!

M