Her immediate family consists of my mom, brother, her husband, 2 married kids and myself. Needless to say, we're all devastated although we've known for a long time that this was a possiblity. I think until you hear the actually dianosis you continue to hope that you're wrong.
She is in complete denial. We have family counseling set up, but she says that this isn't anybody else's business so we are very nervous about how this may unfold.
The doctors feel that she's had this for the last 4-6 years, she's 51.
I'm just looking for a place to "talk" and know that I'm not alone. My family is very close and this feels like a death right now. I lost my sister months ago (she's gone downhill quickly in the last 8 months), but still yearn to have her back. We were very close.

It is so hard when someone is so young. I am questioning about my husband. He is 54. things have seemed a little strange for several years. You mentioned that the doctor thought that it was coming on for 4 to 6 years. I am interested in what others are seeing as early signs of this in younger people. I know that everyone is different and everyone shows different signs. If you feel up to it, I would be interested in what you saw. I have noticed the most the mood changes, anger for no apparent reason. agitation. questioning me on why I say things that don't make sense, I must be doing it to confuse him and make him mad, etc. not remembering my most recent conversations or comments.

There sure is a lot of good reading here. thanks.

I have to ask is she on medication for AD?If not It CAN help......

Cindy, my heart goes out to you and your family. It is devastating to say the least to be told that a loved one has Alzheimer's disease. But there is still so much for her to offer to society. In the early stages, she has much left to do, she still has to live her life to the best of her ability. Counseling will be a great help to the family and please know that you or her are not alone. We are all here for all of you.

To answer Mary in Montana's question about what we noticed as signs. It's been most of the things you listed: mood changes, anger for no apparent reason, agitation, not remembering our most recent conversations or comments, child-like behavior, buying all kinds of "junky" things, using incorrect words where sometimes it's hard to know what she's trying to say, getting in contact with past boyfriends (she's been married 30 years), not cooking meals any longer (she was a really good cook). The most difficult thing right now is that she's been told she can't drive and she insists that she's a good driver although there's been a few times that she's turned left on a red arrow while with Mom. Looking back I guess we've seen signs for at least 3.5 years. She is not on any medication at this time, but I understand that she will be. Not sure when. She's having another MRI today.

Thanks for the info. It sure helps when you hear from others that these things really are problems. I have been visiting about my husband in a line called "Pre-Signs to Stage 1" if you would like to read more. I have tried to get him to talk about (admit) that there might be something going on but have had no luck yet. If I had to guess, I'll bet this has been going on for three to five years. I know that with me, it really helps to talk about it with someone who understands and cares. My 28 YO son understands and it quick to drop everything and come visit if I need him; my 25 YO daughter still thinks her dad is "putting things on" and thinks I am reading more into it than I should. Until he wants/agrees to pursue things, I will continue to enjoy the good days and keep peace on the bad days.

Mary,
That's exactly what my family and I did with my sister; waited until she agreed that something was wrong and my brother-in-law could get her to agree to go see a doctor. It still isn't easy since she's in denial about everything, but we feel that at least she's going to get some help. Her son was very skeptical like you're saying your daughter is, but he's coming around now that we have a diagnosis.

We're all anxious for our family counseling session which is 3/26. I don't have any idea how she'll react to this, although she knows we're all going to be there.

We pray for a cure! Keep in touch.

my sister was also diagnosed with early onset alzheimer's recently (although she has had memory problems for 4 - 5 years already - she has not been able to work for 2 years - she used to take care of my mother ( when my father died) but now i do because i felt she could not physically nor mentally do it anymore -
She is divorced and only has one son so I help her a lot - what can i expect as far as a time frame of her illness? I know it is progressive, but at what rate? she is now 54 years old -

cgk,

The doctor thinks that my sister has had alzheimer's for 4-6 years. As we think back to her behavior during that timeframe, he's probably right. My sister's has progressed very quickly although they'e going to start her on meds (just don't know which ones) at her next visit which is 3/26 so we're hoping that this will slow things down. She's in complete denial still and won't talk to me about it. We used to be very close, but that has changed in the last couple of years. We have a family counseling session on 3/26 as well and I'm hoping I can get some insight into a way to get back to her trusting me. I'm very sad. I want my sister back.

I am showing early signs od EOAD, especially bouts of disorientation and memory loss. I am 50 years old. Who can I go to to be tested? Frankly, I am a little scared.

Denver
dkschimming@comcast.net

My sister, 57, has just been diagnosed as well. Her husband (can't say what I really want to about him) is totally in denail. Retired from his job, took a consulting job out of state a WEEK after she was diagnosed. My siblings and I are taking turns trying to help her. He thinks she can still drive, handle money, etc. She was with me for a week and it is a shame how fast she seems to be changing.

Hopefully, she will be assessed by a great memory clinc and we will know a little bit more about her and what we are facing.

Denver - please start with a neuorolgist (sp).

Hi David and Welcome. My heart goes out to you but please know that you are not alone. First you need to see a Neurologist ASAP to be tested and see what is going on. It is scary when you have things going on that are not "normal" such as memory loss and forgetfulness. The feelings you have are quite normal. Please let us know how things are going and feel free to e-mail me personally if you wish.

Cindy my mom was 54 when she first showed signs. She came to live with me at 58 in 98, today she is 69 and in the later stages. Things are really getting harder and harder as we are coming to the end.

Debbieg,

I'm feeling so much anger and frustration and sometimes it's at her. Then I feel so guilty. This is so hard and I know from research that it's only going to get harder. Have you had her with you all of these years? My Mom, brother and I support each other, but we're all just flailing around. Mom spends the most time with her (except her husband, who is great with her). I'm not always sure how to respond to her child-like behavior. I'm really feeling inept right now. Any suggestions would be helpful.

Wow, I've been reading on these message boards for the last week since an MRI showed significant shrinkage in the frontal and temporal lobes of my 51 year old husband. The dr says Dementia and we have an appointment with a neurologist and pyscologist next week. This thread has really hit home as he is in complete denial and won't even entertain the idea that he has this disease. He has the anger, agression, memory loss, childlike at times behavior, mood swings....at times we have no idea what is going to set him off. Since this diagnosis and my reading online, I've found that if he gets aggitated that I can ask him about a different subject and it seems to take his mind off the current outburst. We have 2 daughters in their 20's and lots of friends that have been so supportive even when we didn't know why he was acting the way he was. Looking back, I can see symptoms probably as long as 5 years ago.
Thank you so much for all of you being here at this site. I look forward to learning more and more from you and just having similar situations instead of the typical elderly parents that are usually thought of with AD.

Dear akh,
Hello and welcome. I'm sorry for what brings you here. The neuropsych testing will help answer alot of questions regarding deficiencies. This is a very difficult time for you, your husband and your entire family. We are here if you need us. Please come often and let us know how everyone is doing. You may want to contact your local Alz assn. for some additional support.

Good Luck

Our thoughts and prayers are with you,

You may want to post on the caregivers site, also, because alot of people read that site.

Peace and Hope,

My hubby had his 5 hours of neuropsych testing yesterday. I have noticed signs for several years but just in the last year it has gotten so much more noticable. We don't have a diagnosis as of yet but even if the tests show nothing, there IS something wrong with him. He told me that if the tests don't show he has a disease that I am never to bring up the subject of his memory or confusion again. No way, no how. I just want to cry ... he is scared and won't admit it.....
Sheila

It was the neuropsych testing that broke through my denial. I was so shocked at my poor performance, the doc had me stop and come back a week later. Then at the summary meeting, sitting there with my wife and hearing that I was worse than I'd feared . . . That was a painful but necessary moment of clarity. I hope your husband has his soon.

Cindy H...
I am so sorry about your mother's diagnosis. My mother was diagnosed 3 years ago when she was 62, but she exhibited signs well before that. I am so glad that your father is supportive. My father was the opposite. He didn't seem to get why she was unresponsive to him and took it personally. Without his support is has turned into a mess.
The best piece of advice I can give to you and your family is to go to support groups. In some areas they have some that are specific to spouses of early onset patients. Your father still has needs that your mother may not be able to fill. He will need strategies on how to deal with that. I think getting your mom on the meds will help her as well and I would do that as soon as possible. My mother is on Lexapro and Aricept and when she has not taken them there is a very noticeable difference!

Alan in Colorado,
Thanks so much for your reply. My hubby mentioned that he was embarrassed and humiliated because there were things that he KNEW he KNEW, but couldn't answer. I am sure that was upsetting. We are supposed to get some results on Wednesday. I am anxious but scared to hear what the doctor has to say. Did you go to a neurologist as well? My heart just breaks to see him this way and know but NOT know something is wrong. Thanks again for your reply. I would be interested to hear more from you.

SheilaKay, my neurologist was the one to refer me to the neuropsychologist, after other medical problems were ruled out.

For me, Denial still comes and goes, but less so with each passing month. Think of Denial as our taking a break. Having a terminal neurological illness is very, very hard to accept. We can only eat so much of the truth, before we have to take a break to digest a while.

Also speaking for myself, it's a major mistake for my wife to try to reason through my Denial, it just makes me angry. I'll get where I need to go, but let me take a break when I need one. Maybe your husband is like that, too.

Ask any other questions that you want to. Be warned though, your husband and I are two different people, and everyone is different in their symptom profile and their acceptance process.

Sheilakay,
I can sure relate to you as we are just going to have the neuropsych testing done on the 14th. They told us 3 or 4 hours, will it really take 5? Were you able to go in with your husband? My husband had an MRI first (at my insistance because of family history with brain tumors) and even thought the dr told us that he has dementia, he thinks he is fine because there wasn't a tumor or sign of a stroke.
Alan in Colorado,
How long have you been diagnosed? I'm so glad to read your comments.
I've been finding out new things about my husband almost daily since this has been diagnosed (I've been asking questions) and what I've found is scary. He has been written up at work for creating a hostile work environment with the threat of a layoff or witholding of his commission. He was advised to seek an anger management class(which he didn't do) and he's been more and more violent on the golf course, yelling and throwing clubs. I can't wait to go to the next 2 dr's to see what they have to say.

When my husband had neuropsych testing done, the neuropsychologist talked to us together first. During that time she asked my husband about his symptoms and questions such as what year we got married, how long we'd been married, how old our sons are, etc. He told her we'd been married 40 years and our son was 41 - not true!

Then she talked to me alone to confirm his answers and find out if I had noticed any symptoms he didn't mention.

Next, they did the testing. It did take about 5 hours. I think that varies based on the individual's educational background. My husband has a Ph.D. They would not let me be in the room with him. I stayed in the waiting room. They said it was ok if I left, but they needed to be able to get hold of me.

We went back about a week later to discuss the results with the doctor.

Hope that helps.

Janelle

Thanks, it does help.

Seem like there are so many variables. My hubby had a brain MRI last summer. He was having trouble with his ears feeling full and finally the ear doc had him do the mri. There wasn't any tumor or anything but they were just looking for hearing loss problems. I don't know if they would have read anything into it had they been looking for something else. Anyhow, at that time our family doctor suggest we see a neurologist. DH got very mad at me over this. He felt like I was trying to get back at him or something. He flat refused to see a neurologist but DID go get hearing aids. Makes him hear better but didn't eliminate the confusion/memory problems.
We don't have a return appt yet with the psychologist who had him tested. She is going to call me this coming Wednesday to give me some input then we will see her when she gets back from vacation.
I find it very hard to be patient with DH when he is having a bad day. Things like watching him put dollar bills in his wallet....it takes forever. Little things are hard for him. Reading direction, doing things around the house that he never used to have to think about doing...he just DID. Now it is a chore to do.
Tonight we measured for mini blinds. Wow. Parts of that were difficult as well. Patience I keep telling myself. He's not the same dynamic man I fell in love with. He's becoming a different man and I want very much to stay in love with him no matter what. I try to give him his space. If he doesn't want to talk about something, then we don't. When he is ready we talk. One question tho....when you know you have told him something more than once and you have to repeat it again, do you remind him that he already heard it or do you just keep repeating.
So many questions.
Now waiting on the results of the testing. Yes, it took 5 hours....we were told 4.
Sheilakay