Hello, I have been on here before. I am a HUGE suporter of ALZ.org and always found nothing but passion on these boards.

Well, tonight the family is coming together to have a big discussion. A Hospice care person will be there with us, so you know where I am going with this.

My mother is in stage 7b, cannot swallow, is aspirating food and water, is skin and bones and has broken both of her hips in the last year at her care facility. This horrible disease has taken it's toll. We are faced with a feeding tube or Hospice. She has this spasm where she pulls at things with force. They are affraid she might pull it out or get an infection. She is so weak anything could end it.

We are all just so wiped and saddened by this.

Any suggestions, am I alone with this issue?

Don't mean to post something so depressing, but I am just looking for anything these days.

Ryan in Dallas, TX

I am so sorry for the choices facing you and your family. Be at peace. She is in G d hand regardless of any choice you make or do not make.

I am so very sorry you have to go through this.

You may find the booklet "Hard Choices for Loving People" helpful. It was written by a chaplain who has many years' experience helping families such as yours. It can be downloaded for free at:

http://www.hardchoices.com/

Click on 'Complete Text (PDF)"

My thoughts are with you.

Well...

It was a tough evening. She is entering Hospice care as of today.

It simply hasn't hit me yet. She means more to me than I can even recognize at this moment.

Thank you for reading.

Hi Ryon,

I'm so sorry you have had to make that decision. My family had to do the same with my mom (EOAD) and my dad (othe COD).

All I can tell you is that it was peaceful and apparently painless. It was really hard to let them go. When my mom passed, I looked at it as her being freed from the prison of Alzheimers. That made me feel a lot better. I know she is now in a better place!

That was 8 years ago, but I have to be honest, I occasionally feel guilt about it. I know it was my mom and dad's wishes, but...

Then, I shake it off and remember that it set her free! I hope if I get alzheimer's, my kids will do the same for me.

Just know that you are not alone, and at this stage it's really the right thing to do. Think of it as setting her free, it is a gift.

You are in my thoughts and prayers.

Lol

Dear Ryon,
I definitely agree with you decision. It was the RIGHT/LOVING decision! I know it was a difficult one.
Allowing your loved one to die with dignity, in comfort and lots of care is a great gift.
As an ex-Hospice nurse, I can tell you first hand what a great gift you've bestowed.
DO NOT FEEL GUILITY!!!

Peace and Hope,