Since moving into the NH on July 31, Mom has adapted fairly well. She thinks she works at the NH. That's a good thing for her, but it does create some interesting moments for the aides when Mom insists on trying to help the other residents! We probably drive the staff insane, but so far they handle us well, too! LOL We do check her med sheets and sometimes the nurses' notes and one of us is there pretty much every day just popping in and out at various times.

Mom had a fall and was in the hospital for 3 days last week. Nothing broken, thank you Lord. It was no one's fault. I know exactly how it happened because it happened when she was here with me, as well. While I cannot say the NH is perfect, Mom is getting very good care and most of the aides are wonderful. None are really bad, but some are more motivated than others, some are more intuitive than others. In some ways, Mom is better, but she does continue to slide down that blasted mountain. But she is content most of the time, and she is safe. And some days I accept and some days I cry.

I know how hard it is those first few weeks and months. I had those tearful moments, as well. I'm glad she was not injured when she fell. Mom fell a lot, too. I almost quit getting excited about it, sad to say. It sounds like she's making the transition a lot better than you are!

I understand the tears, my partner is also in a very good home with caring staff but everyday after visiting for at least a month I sat in the car and cried. I'm glad your Mom is making a good adjustment to placement.

Memaw,

Good to hear from you! Glad your mom is adjusting. Now we just need to get you adjusted, huh? I guess there will always be those sad days. But it sounds like you're doing great!

Hugs & prayers always,

Dear Meemaw: It is good to hear from you and to get an update as only you can write.

Having been in a similar circumstance, I truly understand and send soft hugs your way.

You are a WONDERFUL advocate and are an example to us all.

Johanna C.

Hi Memmaw2287 I'm glad to hear your mother is doing well in the NH. Mine also just went in recently, so even though you know it's the right thing, it still doesn't make it easy. I do cry myself at times as well. For the most part mine is well taken care of, but like with most nursing homes, there are always a few bad apples. I go to see my Mom almost everyday, and a few weeks ago when I went to see her, she was siting in chair by her bed, unattended with just a shirt and her diaper on! I was so mad I was shaking!

I mean first of all she isn't able to walk without assistance, so if she were to try to get up, she could have fallen and to leave her like that for everyone to see just really sent me into orbit. I found out who the CNA was that did that and told the NH I did not want her to touch my mother again. The girl is lazy and has an attitude. Not sure why they don't let her go considering the complaints she has gotten from other residents and their families.

Anyway, besides that, most are great with my mom and just love her. (except when she has her combative moments, but I have learned to just agree with her and she chills out)

You know the strangest part? After living with me for two years, most of the time Mom did not know that I am her daughter. Since moving into the NH, she ALWAYS remembers who I am. She still seldom remembers my name, but when she introduces me to the aides (every time I'm there, God love her), she says, "This is my youngest daughter." So I got a promotion! I've gone from being the caregiver that kept getting fired to the daughter! There is a bright spot in everything. LOL

Hey Memaw...so glad to see your post..I have been thinking about you..haven't really seen you since I got back from taking mom and dad back to their city...anyway, it sounds to me like your mom has really adjusted well..I am so glad she did not break anything when she fell.

My dad fell at home and he has fallen at the NH..it just happens..he gets dizzy alot...he did not know my mother when he was living at home with her..since he has been in the NH he knows her...its really strange but I still say the structure and the routine of the NH helps tremendously with dementia...I have seen it first hand with dad.

Glad you got the promotion..that is awesome news!

kim