I live in Redondo Beach, CA (as you can tell by my postname). Anyways, it is now clear that Dad cannot live any longer by himself. This morning, he called the fire department; and they came and broke a window to get in his house. My husband had just changed the locks on the house. We do not have a lot of money, but I am realizing that we will need to be bringing someone to live with dad; giving free rent, and paying them a certain amount of money. It would seem like a desirable situation for the right person. We, definitely, will be interviewing to find the right person. Thanks for any advice ahead of time in this situation. My nerves are now completely shot. I have a daughter with Autism, and this situation is beyond my ability to care for both of them effectively. My husband is suggesting to post on Craigslist. I would prefer to have a referral. We do not have the money to pay out for a professional to come into the house.

Wendy

Maybe try asking around at local churches?
I think I remember this being discussed before on this board, so maybe someone who has successfully done this can chime in.
One thing that comes to mind- are you planning to give this live-in caregiver any time off and have someone (you or another paid aide or adult daycare) cover during that time? It seems that most paid caregivers don't do this 24/7 all year. I can imagine that it would be likely that they'd need or want some time for themselves. But please note, this is just my speculation. I haven't experienced this at all personally.

Good luck in finding someone great to care for your Dad.

I don't know what the quality is but there's a college of holistic health in Redondo...

You might find a mature student who needs a place to live while s/he studies there--a situation that could work for all of you.

But as jellybeans wrote, whoever you hire will need time off... could your dad go to daycare (he may resist at first, but many LO's are told it's a job and they end up liking it...)

I have lots of experience hiring caregivers, but no one lives with my LO. She recieves 24-hour care but in shifts. Three shifts on the weekdays and 2 12-hour shifts on the weekends. (I'm with her week days.) Our overnight caregivers do not sleep since LO gets up alot at night.

Through trial and error I've learned that I prefer finding my own people rather than using a service.

It was tough at first, but I just started putting the word out to everyone I spoke to or came in contact with, as it was appropriate.

Craigslist is not a bad idea. You'd want to get references (you must follow up) and do a background check through your local sheriff's office (only $5 here in Florida) on ANYONE you hire. Local churches would be a good place to look, too.

I really lucked out when I hired a nursing student who has connected me with a pool of other nursing students.

Since we started 24-hour care, the turn-over has been more than I expected. But thankfully, my LO seems to adapt well as I make sure they know her routine before they come in on their own. LO hardly even notices when it is someone new and never even mentions the ones who have had to leave.

I've had to fire some for various reasons. One was simply a wrong fit (too brash for my sweet, elegant, gentle LO). Another kept wanting days off when it was vital LO had the same person during the days I'm not there (Sat. & Sun.). Another I hired before the background check went through (my bad) and she had a third degree felony for employee theft on her record.

With all who've worked with us, I've had to learn to listen to my LO and hear her beyond what she is able to tell me. I've had to learn that even though she can't be specific, if she expresses any discomfiture, there is something which needs to be addressed. I've had to talk to a few of our caregivers about many small things. It has surprised me how receptive most are to little suggestions. More than that, I've amazed myself at finding the strength and courage to address the issues (I'm SO non-confrontational).

With this recession, it may be possible to find someone to live with your dad, but you MUST do all you can to ensure his safety and tender care.

One of the biggest things I've learned, though, is to listen to my LO when she talks about the other caregivers. Someone on this site has a quote ... they may forget what you do, but they always remember how it made them FEEL. My LO's input about her caregivers has been invaluable as I work hard to keep her life serene and safe.

Hope some of this helped.

Good luck!

Teri

I'm not sure how it works in CA, but in NY, it's common that if you hire a caregiver through an agency, you can then come to your own arrangement with them. The agencies are aware of this and typically take their fee only for the first week or two (they count on making their money off new bookings). I was able to locate a caregiver this way who's still with us six years later. In fact, when my father went onto community Medicaid, we arranged to have her hired by the Medicaid agency so she could continue on the case.

The advantage of going through a service is that you have some degree of accountability and some assurance about skills. The agency might also be bonded, which is a good thing. It takes trial and error - there was a caregiver we let go before we came up with the one we kept - but I'd rather work with an organization than go "over the transom."

I'm also in favor of working with a geriatric care manager - someone who knows the local resources and can help guide you through the agencies.

Hope this helps.


Best,
Alan

I wanted to hire one of the agency's caregivers to work FOR us, since she was faithfully working at least 40 hours a week and more when she helped me cover for the ones who didn't show up or called off. But the agency required a $5000 finder's fee for me to hire her away.

She left them (honorably, with notice) because she needed more money and benefits and found another job working independently. I can hire her after one year without reprisal.

It sure would have made my life easier if the agency would have let me hire her. She was really good and they even begged her to stay. I'm just hoping she's available when and if I need her after the year is up. She was the only one the agency provided who made a difference in LO's world.

Maybe that's a question to ask the agency up front before you use their service. "Can I hire your caregivers independently?"

Teri

Though I just posted on reasons to not use an agency,
this article discusses why it's important to have a certified agency:
Certified Home Care

The other advantage to the worker of being in an agency is that they receive social security.

If I had used an agency,we would have run out of money too quickly and I would not have been able to keep my mother at home. I also think that by paying the aide a decent wage (which the agencies do not) that the loyalty is greater and the commitment longer term (my mother's aides stayed for two years).

But it's important to understand all sides of the issue.

quote:

Originally posted by brightwings:

The other advantage to the worker of being in an agency is that they receive social security.

Household workers hired directly also get social security, but we're the ones who have to deduct their share and pay the employer's share. It's a bit of a hassle but I agree that it's a better deal all around. I guess some agencies pay the caregivers' medical insurance and offer paid vacations -- something I don't think I'll ever be able to do -- but I don't think most agencies are that good to their staff.