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Posted
Okay, I think I just need to vent. Don't really post but read a lot. I am getting frustrated trying to figure out what to feed my 88 year old mom who lives with us. She went from eating whatever I put in front of her to becoming extremely picky. I am so tired of having to try to come up with a menu for her. She complains that things are too hot for her to eat, unless of course there is sugar involved. Smiler Anything I suggest to her, she just stares at me, which means no she doesn't want that. Luckily today, I suggested tuna fish sandwhich and she like it. Hopefully she will like it tomorrow but who know.

Oh, and I am also so sick of hearing "I'm cold" while the rest of us are sweating!! Those are her first words out of her mouth in the morning. I did buy an electric throw from Costco that she tried to day and seem to like.

Okay, enough venting. Thanks for listening. I just needed to tonight. Smiler
 
Posts: 4 | Location?: Austin, Texas | Registered: August 08, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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I am sorry to say, but there are no easy answers. What pleases them one day is hated the next.

The best advice I can offer is this: You are dealing with, mentally, a toddler. All you can do is try to satisfy, within reason, the desire of the moment.

Remember, it is NOT personal, it is not designed to irritate you intentionally. The patients have no idea that their world is not the same as the one we live in.

Compromise where you must, and use other methods when necessery.

"Mom/Dad, I brought your FAVORITe-tuna sandwich."

"I hate tuna."

"No, you LOVE tuna. We made this a couple days ago, and you told me you like it. Give it a try and let's find out."

Poor example, perhaps, but you get the idea.

Also, change the subject when possible.

Some things will stick in their heads, though, and there is no way to stop this.

Best luck in all of it, it is very difficult, and I feel for you, having experienced it myself.


Glad to be here, and thank you for such a wonderful forum
 
Posts: 42 | Location?: Florida | Registered: September 28, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Don't know if this will help, but I found that including something sweet on the plate helps, even if it is an oatmeal cookie, a brownie, a cup of Del Monte peaches, a handful of grapes or a cup of pudding. (These are things my LO likes.) My LO nibbles at the sweet thing in between bites of her real meal. She actually eats better!
 
Posts: 363 | Location?: Atlantic Beach, Florida | Registered: January 02, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Oh, and about "I'm cold ..."

Layering and socks, if you can get her to.

And the drug store carries microwaveable bean-bag-like things that might help you through the winter. Snuggly!
 
Posts: 363 | Location?: Atlantic Beach, Florida | Registered: January 02, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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My Grandma LOVES ketchup, even pre-AD. So, anything I give her, I give her with ketchup on the side and life is good.
When she was in rehab for her hip, I noticed that they had a lot of food on the tray and the dietician said it was specifically because of what you posted. Perhaps if you had some of yesterday's leftovers, something else, and the main course that you planned, your LO would find something to eat that was desirable at the time.
Something about AD makes temperature difficult to tolerate. Not to mention, the elderly have less body fat to insulate them. Sweaters and layers seem to help me.


______________________
Contact your local and federal representatives to get financial support for providing care for your loved ones at home. Ask them to support full funding for the Lifespan Respite Care Act.
 
Posts: 1082 | Registered: May 24, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Thanks for all the suggestions. I will try ALL of them. Smiler I will go to look for the bean bags to heat up TODAY. I think I could use that as well.

God Bless
 
Posts: 4 | Location?: Austin, Texas | Registered: August 08, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Eliza, I could have written your post myself! So thanks, all who responded to Eliza, as you've given me a few ideas as well. AD has made my mom so self focused that it's a battle to feed or dress her. She complains about everything. So sad and so frustrating.


char
 
Posts: 37 | Location?: tx | Registered: July 19, 2008Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post

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Hi, Eliza!

Sometimes we do need just to vent! And that's another excellent reason to be part of this forum. I am so glad you are here.

The others have given you some great advice so I don't really have any to add. I just wanted to say WELCOME! And you are doing a great job!

Keep up the good work! And keep coming back!


"dj" daughter of mother with AD
"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest." Matthew 11:28
 
Posts: 788 | Location?: Ortonville, Michigan | Registered: October 01, 2007Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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Eliza, I think my mother was born cold! She has been keeping her house close to 80 degrees all year around. When she's in Florida, she sets it down to 55 for the winter, but when she gets home, it goes right back up. I loaned her a pair of my silk long underwear and she loved 'em. They have no weight or thickness but are warmer than some wool sweaters. She loves them and bought two pairs for herself. They aren't cheap - about $40 for the top and $25-30 for the bottom on Land's End, but well worth it.
My mom refuses to wear socks, only pantyhose, so ankles could be getting cold. Just a thought. I found some bootie slippers for her at Bed, Bath and Beyond that have microwaveable inserts to heat up.
My mom craves sweets now too. Glad to read the other suggestions here.
 
Posts: 193 | Location?: West Michigan | Registered: April 08, 2009Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
KML
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My dad is getting fussy about eating now, too. I have cooked for him for 11 years and when he lost weight, I got it back up. I put a lot of effort and thought into his meals to make sure they are nutritious and packed with flavor he's also diabetic, but he would rather eat a Wendy's hamburger and eat popsicles Roll Eyes I have been resenting having to provide his meals and him complaining that it's too much (not), too chewy (not) I don't like broccoli, carrots, green beans, rice, etc. I have decided to cook only some of his meals from scratch and then the other half is going to be frozen dinners with added fresh whatever new vegetable I can come up with. My weekends have been spent cooking for the week and taking care of him in addition to taking care of him during the week. I have no more time and energy left. What he doesn't like today, he may like next week again. It's hit and miss and it can get very frustrating. Mostly, at this point, I'm happy if he eats something even if it's a Wendy's hamburger Mad.
 
Posts: 2330 | Registered: October 16, 2007Reply With QuoteEdit or Delete MessageReport This Post
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