Originally posted October 01, 2009 09:05 AM in another thread by Seychelle:

I, too, am going through a situation with my Dad who has dementia, and a very manipulative, controlling "girlfriend" who is trying to gain control of his assets. She has even attempted to convince my Dad to revoke me as his POA. She had Dad sign a document and had it notarized. My three attempts to secure housing for Dad away from her have each been destroyed by her. I am so frustrated. It is a very long story, but my brother and I are thinking that we need a restraining order against this person and/or guardianship of Dad before it's too late and she gets him to marry her (which he says he won't do- but he said he wouldn't revoke the POA, either.) It's a horrible mess. I'm glad to have found this site and to know that I am not alone.... Any advice/ support to share is welcome!

Linda in WA state

Seychelle - talk to an elder law attorney.

Find one here:

http://www.naela.org/MemberDirectory/

http://www.nelf.org/

Linda,
I am so sorry you are going through this!
AD is rough enough without something like this. I don't have any advice, but just wanted to welcome you to the forum. There are tons of people here who want to help as much as possible.

I wan tto welcome you also..PLEASE for the sake of your brother and dad contact an elder law attorney immediately..Your local chapter can help you..They are wonderful..there is nothing worse than the person who is NOT a blood relative that all of a sudden knows what is best for our LO"s care..Not trying to sound harsh but being very open and honest..I have heard nightmare stories of people's children losing everything to a stepparent or girldfriend/boyfriend of a parent or LO...you are his next of kin and have a right to stand up for yourself in his best interest if you think he is in an unrealistic situation.

Welcome and amen to all of the above...I am sorry that you have to deal someone like your dad's girlfriend...you really must get to an elder atty..get things done the right way so she cannot make decisions for your dad...we are here for you and keep us posted...

God Bless
kim

Welcome, Seychelle!

Sorry you're going through this tough time. Hope you find some answers on this forum. It is a wonderful place for information and support!

Definitely speak with an elder law attorney! It is well worth the money. You must protect your dad.

Blessings!

Hi, Seychelle:

We went through a situation with our mother and a "boyfriend" - predator - who was taking advantage of her. We were afraid he was going to try to marry her to gain control of her money, condo, and car. We went to a good elder care attorney who understood the situation and advised us to get guardianship immediately. My mother's judgment was was, way off and she couldn't handle this situation. The guardianship helped us then and later with other situations.
You need to keep your dad safe. Find a good elder care attorney and he/she will advise you. Good luck.