I can answer the question about a parent that specifies one of their children as their POA in the event that they can no longer make sound choices on their own behalf,,,,,no,,the child is not responsible for that parent. Usually when an attorney draws up a trust/will,,there is always 2 designated POA,,,one as the Primary,,and in case the primary can't/won/t take the responsibility,,it goes to the second choice of POA.

If you didnt' sign any legal documents in regards to accepting the POA,,then you have every legal right to decline.

This law protects children of family members that designated a child without signature,,since many children have not seen or kept in touch with a parent .

In the event that no secondary POA was assigned,,,then they court gets a court appointed conservator to oversee the person.

Hope this clears the question that you've asked. Peace

Hi Raven,
Just to clarify...my husband has accepted POA duties. He and older brother took MIL to attorney the day before she entered ALF and got all the POAs in order. So while he didn't sign anything, he acknowledges that he is indeed her POA.

The case we've been discussing here and the one I read recently in local newspaper does not seem to mention if POAs are in place. That's why I wondered if a child has legal responsibility even though there isn't POA invoked.

Thanks for taking time to reply.

Kathy, The laws will vary some in each state.
I can tell you in Ohio, if you know the person is incompetent and something happens you can be held responsible.It doesn't matter whether you have poa or if your even the caregiver.

There was another recent case in Dayton Ohio where the children of an incompetent parent were charged with neglect.

The Cox's were released on there Own Recognizance, and ordered not to leave Union county. Also placed on a curfew. The next hearing date is,3/21/2008 @ 10:15 am. The prosecuter is recommending prison time.

When I took my DH into the ER on Dec 24th a social worker got involved and threw a fit, saying I had abused him. He was skinny, but eats like a horse. He needed a haircut unless u like your hair long. He adored his beard, but according to the social worker, beards arent for older men. I was listed as "non-compliant" when while i was in the hospital i didnt just jump up and do what the social worker asked me to do. I was so ill, and semi conscious, how could i just up and run around and conduct phone calls from a hospital bed. I got home, weak, yet recovering and attended to business at hand. Cuple weeks later, a second social worker knocked on my door, i had just woke up, barefoot and dont want outdoor cats in nor indoor cats out, stood on the porch and talked to this guy. He told me I shouldve been buying DH hamburgers from Burger King, 2-3 a meal, every single meal. Well the disability money we got, with 2 children still in home, I spent on bills. Heat, phone, water, food, etc. Once a week, we did go out to fast food, and enjoyed dinner. But I was told that morning, that i had abused the money by not buying 20.00 worth of food every meal out for my DH. Plus the time and money/gas it would take to drive into town, we live out in sheep country. I wouldnt have enuff to pay bills if i did that consistently, I made the money last, tho i didnt save anything. We lived from payday to payday. I did not abuse my DH. I married him becuz I fell in love with him. Not becuz he was going to have disability money at age 65 and I could spend it wildly . I was doing what I thought was right, with the Disability money. Paying the bills, feeding our children, etc. I came to this support group for answers, found wonderful ppl, and took DH into hosp when needed. We were new to an area, so didnt have drs eitehr, but theres always the hosp emerg room! I felt ppl pointing thier finger at me yes. becuz maybe i couldve done it differently. So if i can backtrack to when he first got diagnosed, my medical issues still there, and two minor children, the welfare we were on, went off at disability income. they told us to use that as our income so i did. was i supose to just give it all to hubby ? and forget my two young sons tummies growling in the nite? becuz he got to eat all the food himself or save back the money and we werent allowed to use it? i didnt think that way. i figured we shared our lives. we shared everything. This social worker made me feel like thats what i was suppose to have done. I taught my sons how to make meals, one child did chinese meals every cuple days, another bar b q chickens, man i just do salads, but together we managed major meals for ALL of our family to enjoy. I feel for these ppl in the news becuz how do we really know what was going on? Tho theres always the ER too.

New events,

The prosecuting attorney and the defendents attorney make a joint recommendation to the court that the defendent ''Dennis Cox'' plead guilty of involuntary manslaughter.

Sentence to be five years in prison.

Part of the agreement is,that he testifies against the co-defendent.

Interesting...

Keep us informed..

thanks caregiver1

Debbie

For anyone that missed it...rjb (a relative of the Cox's) posted on Ohio's "What do you think' thread.

If what she posted is true, I sincerely hope that Mr. Cox turns down the plea bargain and makes the state have to fight to win their case. Accepting the involuntary manslaughter conviction will make the situation harder on every caregiver.

If I were defending him, one of the things that I would do is visit a few nursing homes and take hundreds of pictures of residents and show them to the jury. If bruises, bed sores, and weight loss are indicative of abuse...there must be a lot of it being done by 'trained professionals'.

I have taken the liberty of re-posting the entry here.
Ohio's thread page: http://alzheimers.infopop.cc/eve/forums/a/tpc/f/214102241/m/9951089082

rjb Posted February 23, 2008 01:02 PM
"I am a little more "informed" than most of you, Evelyn was my aunt. She was a loving, hardworking farm wife who was miserable lying in a bed not able to work or do for herself. She did not want to go to a nursing home and Jimmy was trying to honor her request and he and Lisa were doing the best they could. Evelyn had lost her appetite long before she was bed-ridden and had already lost a lot of weight. She had lost my uncle, then her sister, was diagnosed, and didn't have her barn full of livestock to care for anymore. She did have home health nurses in twice a week and was to her doctor 6 days before her death. The press doesn't tell the whole story. They have never mentioned how close Jim and his mother were, how hard her illness and death was on the family, what it does to you to watch your mother starving and not able to do a thing about it.(My mother died of cancer almost twenty years ago and I was the one caring for her at home, along with Hospice nurses, should I be worried that two decades later I may be charged?) There is a tremendous amount of guilt on the part of the caregivers after they lose a loved one, being warranted or not. You have guilt for the sense of relief you feel when it's all over and they don't have to suffer anymore.You wonder if there was anything else you could have done.The last thing a cargiver needs is the law telling you it was your fault when you had done everything in your power. I can remember crying and begging my mother to eat and drink. I pray that Evelyn is NOT watching over from above. What they are doing to her son and grand-daughter-in-law would hurt her more than the three months before her death."


One has to wonder: why in the world is the attorney even considering a plea? If Mrs. Cox had been seen by the doctor and the home health aides, there should be plenty of documentation to refute the charges. If Jim and Lisa do end up convicted, it would be a travesty of justice, to not have the medical professionals' practices and procedures brought into question, also.

From caregiver1
"New events,

The prosecuting attorney and the defendents attorney make a joint recommendation to the court that the defendent ''Dennis Cox'' plead guilty of involuntary manslaughter.

Sentence to be five years in prison.

Part of the agreement is,that he testifies against the co-defendent."

So much for a trial. Justice? We'll never know what really happened. Those folks will become criminals and we won't even be able to speak up for them to say, "YES! YES! YES! People DO starve to death and it is no one's fault."

What do we expect from a political figure in these charged political days? Terri Schiavo part deux.

That really is a shame. I'm wondering if Mr. Cox isn't being bullied into this deal. I'm sure he already feels guilty because that's his mom and I haven't met a caregiver or family member yet who didn't ask "could I have done more?". In regards to why his mom wasn't in a nursing home, I had assumed that his Mom told him before she got ill that she didn't want to go to a nursing home. At least, that's what my parents have told me on numerous occasions. If they had their way, they would rather die at home than in a nursing home. I'm sure all of our parents have said that one time or another which is why placing a loved one in a facility is so gut wrenching.

Alzheimers or dementia are well known diseases. Meaning most people have heard of it and think they know what it is. Example being that I thought dementia and Alzheimers make you forget your past and where you put your keys. These diseases not only do that, they make your brain forget to tell you that you're hungry. They make your taste buds lose the sense of taste. They make you forget what food is for and what to do with it. They make you not feel thirsty.

The only way the public is going to know all of the facts is through education. And lets face it, until it happens to them or someone they love, most probably won't seek out information.

I really hope that Mr. Cox and his lawyer rethink this deal. I feel Mr. Cox has already been through prison.

I am wondering: what is Mr. Cox planning on saying against his Daughter? It sounds as though HE is plea bargaining, but SHE will still be tried?

I can't say much more about the case at this time. But I will say that they haven't offered any deal to Lisa.

I really feel that they don't have enough evidence to convince a jury that they are guilty. And that's the reason for the plea deal.

This is very frightening. What can we do as caregivers to protect ourselves from this happening to us? My father has lost weight and even though I prepare his dinners, and provide him with fresh groceries, clean his house, pay his bills, take him to doctor appointments, fill his prescriptions. Even though I do these things, we are now at the point where we have to supervise him doing certain tasks like eating all his food, drinking enough fluids, takings meds. We are having trouble having him accept in-home care, we are having trouble being at his home to supervise, I work full-time, hence the in-home care to supervise the times I can't. What are we supposed to do, when he refuses these things?

I can only say: document EVERYTHING!
Cover your a@@.
When I worked in home care, I had notebook folders, and gave a complete description of my day, and gave one copy to the Family and kept one for myself. I would also ask for a copy of the doctor's summary of your visits to him/her, each time. Keep your own records-financial as well as medical and day-to-day activities. If you treat a sore, if there is a fall or bump, if your Loved One refuses nourishment, document it. Once you develop the habit, it becomes easier, like a daily journal entry.

I emailed Maureen Kocot and told her about this thread and asked if she could do a report on the stresses of Dementia caregivers.She is the one covering the Cox case.Maybe if enough of us ask they will do this.

E-mail Maureen at: maureen.kocot@10tv.com.

Hey Y'all,
Three weeks ago, mom started feeling warm to the touch and off her food. Slept most on a Sunday afternoon. Worried me sick. Got her to her doctor the very next morning, who admitted her to the hospital. BP was 60/40 (or something really low like that), weight 97, possible pneumonia. They tried 10-12 different times in that hospital over a two 1/2 day stay to get IV's in her--one time the arm swelled up hugely where the needle went thru to her arm, not vein, and was not noticed except by me! Her veins are collapsing and tiny. She refused food there--I tried and tried to feed her at each meal. They had her so doped up; but eventually they did get enough fluids in there for her to go to the bathroom with help and got her blood pressure up. The nurses "knew" about Alz., but apparently thought she should be able to feed herself, etc.. I finally got to speak with her doctor who said, well, it's time for hospice. NO it wasn't! Mom has rallied greatly after being released. Some form of infection, maybe pneumonia, was what was wrong. She DOES refuse to eat at any given time. She DOES hate having her pills crushed up and spoonfed in with applesauce...She will continue to refuse to eat and lose even more weight. But, hospice is only a phone call away and the doctor will authorize them when it is time. But not today. Maybe next month, maybe later than that. I would hope that no one would ever accuse me or my sister of withholding food/water/meds....I hope they let both father/daughter off and apologize.

I think I've heard enough to contribute money to a defense fund. Does anyone know if one is being organized?

PR-

No, but I've had the same thought.

I don't think we're going to be allowed to post about it here too much if there is one.

If someone knows, can you post an email address or web link?

I would be contacting Nancy Grace on CNN,Fox News,numerous talk shows.I would definately get this issue out in the punlic and let BOTH sides be told!!!!!I would not sit back on my butt and not do nothing.

http://www.cnn.com/CNN/Programs/nancy.grace/
This is about halfway down the page


Crime Victims Hotline

If you are a crime victim or someone who knows about an injustice or case that needs a spotlight, call "Nancy Grace" at 1-888-GRACE-01 or send information via e-mail to "Nancy Grace."

You know, I love Nancy Grace, but I'll bet she's one of the reasons the defense in this case isn't screaming for more public attention.

It's hard to see anything more than a "sympathetic victim" when you look at this case from any perspective other than ours, as caregivers.

People like getting all frothed up about bad guys doing horrible things to little old ladies. Probably no one more than Nancy Grace.

I wouldn't assume she'd LOOK FOR any perspective other than the prosecutor's.

Just finished e-mailing Maureen Kocot asking for further information and proceeded to do another Google search.

Came up with a 02/22/08 Marysville Journal Tribune story that can be found on the following link (copy and paste the link if you care to read the full story)

http://www.marysvillejt.com/web/index.php?sid=50&id=476

Below I will copy and paste a portion of one paragraph in the story that provided some interesting information.

"According to court documents, “Evelyn Cox did not receive proper and necessary care, nor did she receive the necessary food, water, nutrition and supplements she needed. Evelyn was not kept clean to the extent of being found soaked in urine with ants in her bed, nor was she turned in her bed as instructed at regular intervals and positions to avoid bed sores, which Evelyn developed.”

Wow. For once, I'm speechless.