Just having quesitions about my decisions

I'm here.....and more will join in as the day goes on. You're not alone.
kris

What is your questioin, dane? We're here to help or hold your hand.

Thank you all for being there. I am trying to decide whether to put my aunt in a nursing home or get home health care. If you read before, I am an only child of three sisters, my mother died from Alzheimer's in 02. now my aunt has it and she can barely dress herself much less feed or do laundry. We have the stove unplugged and we try hard to keep her at home. She loves her home and we want to keep her there. Why does God send cats to people like her? He does and they are so glad, it gives them something to wake up for then they want to know what day it is and what they are supposed to do. They want to do something but they don't know how or what to do. Too much info, I know. Good news for the day ---- James Taylor is on the Today Show and who doesn't love him?

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Originally posted by daane18:
Thank you all for being there. I am trying to decide whether to put my aunt in a nursing home or get home health care. If you read before, I am an only child of three sisters, my mother died from Alzheimer's in 02. now my aunt has it and she can barely dress herself much less feed or do laundry. We have the stove unplugged and we try hard to keep her at home. She loves her home and we want to keep her there. Why does God send cats to people like her? He does and they are so glad, it gives them something to wake up for then they want to know what day it is and what they are supposed to do. They want to do something but they don't know how or what to do. Too much info, I know. Good news for the day ---- James Taylor is on the Today Show and who doesn't love him?

Sorry 'yall for repeating myself, I've never done this before. I am computer illerate and don't even have a cell phone. Yes, I am a country girl but don't consider myself to be a redneck. I live on land that was my mama's family's cotton field and so do my two aunts. I want to take care of them like they would want me to and have them be the happiest to the best of my ability.I am from Greenville, SC and that is no small town. I think I have a great life and I only want the best for them. See, I am trying so hard to take care of them.They are my job and my life. Anybody in that situation?

Dane, my mother used to hallucinate about cats to the point where my Dad would get down on his hands and knees with a flashlight looking for the furry critters! Not too long ago, my brother brought over a kitten he rescued, for a therapy visit. Now, 4 months later, Callie is here to stay, and Mom loves her! In fact, sometimes she is obsessive about the cat. Pets can be a real blessing but they need care and that's up to us caregivers. I read so often of neglected pets and sometimes it is because their owners are not mentally able to remember to feed them and clean up after them.

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They are my job and my life. Anybody in that situation?

My husband and I live with my elderly parents in their own home that they've lived in for 47 years. Don't tell Mom that-- she thinks she just got here yesterday and needs to get home as soon as she can pack her stuff in a pillowcase!

Me again, I just clapped my hands and said thank you for somebody being there and listening to me. My poor dog came running because she doesn't see me act like that very often. Normally the excitement is Aunt Hazel ringing the doorbell and just being so confused. I do have a woundeful husband and daughter and they are the best! They just can't help with decisions that I have to make. And since my mother died from this disease, they think I should know what to do. Who does?

Aw... Dane. I feel heartbroken for you. Please remember that whatever you decide it is for your aunt's best interest. I'm sorry for the loss of your Mom to AD and now your aunt having AD also. You sound like such a loving person. I'm glad that you found us. My Mom has AD too. God be with you.

Peace,
Marcie

Hey 'yall,
Listen to me talking about the cat, I just told you my dog came running to see what I was excited about. My mama was in the nursing home and didn't know me from anything. Her cat was called Blackie (they seem to name them simple things like Tom or Callie, or whatever) My mama would occasionally pet ME and say "Blackie, you're my baby" and that was about as good as it got - at least she connected me with something she loved. I wrote that in my journal and I read it to bring me back up when I get so sad about aunt hazel and her cat. Tom, Bless his fat little heart! We do our best, right? Don't forget JT is on TV in a few minutes!

Hey Marcie, Bless your heart. You have a hard row to how. Your mother is you best friend and biggest fan. You will have such a hard time. I will pray for you. I miss my mama so much. I want to ask her so many things now that I can't. Ask her everything if she knows any answers. You will never regret anything you do! Believe me! Do everything you can and you still won't feel like you've done enough. You have, and she knows it! my name is diane, the grandkids call me dane. I so hope you have a great day - I'll be there for you if I can. Where are you amd what stage is your mother at?

Dane:

Life is full of decisions. And you’re a country girl. Able to enjoy life. Despite a few pitfalls here and there. So, when you gotta make a decision, make it, and continue to make the best of your life. Obviously, you know there’s far more joy than sadness. You’ve got it made. --Jim

Thank you Jim,
Being country never seemed good, but I've never been anything but what I am and I'm proud of it. My family made me who I am an thank God for them. That's why I will do everything for them. I don't want much in life except to know I've done what they would be proud of me for doing. You are so complimentary. Thanks. I know I will make the right decision, and thanks for your support. Love ( I love everybody)
Diane (dane is what my grandkids call me and I will be 50 in 18 days - I feel 28.)

Hey 'YALL, Diane (dane again)
I might come off as a real country girl, but my husband works for a design/engineering company and I have been to Paris, Ireland, Rome, Venice, Switzerland and lived in Spain for a few months. I have traveled in the US from California to New York. I am a country girl, I can my home grown tomatoes (like 20 quarts at a time) and green beans, corn and about anything you would think a country girl would do, and make jelly. I love having a garden and I love my life and I take care of everybody. I just recently got my nails done (for my daughter's wedding in May) for the first time in my life. I can just about pull off anything with anybody, and never bat an eye, I don't speak any foreign language but spanish. I just hate like you must know or you wouldn't be here - to see this happen to somebody I love. No body no where and nothing can change this mean disease. So I can't go anywhere right now, because something could happen and I am the one responsible. My daddy found out last year he had brain tumors that were from melanoma. I stayed with him from the onset till it was his last breath. Maybe I sound pitiful or bitter. Maybe I am. He used to call me and say "your man is on Tv" meaning James Taylor. My 26 year old daughter just called me from his house - thank God again - she is living there so my old house is still accessabile and alive with her. She said "mama, your man is on TV" Well, you're right I do have it made. I taught them well and they pay me back - and pay it forward.

diane

welcome to our forum...I love James Taylor..i think my favorite song by him still is...fire and rain...and he is even better looking than when he was young...his songs say a lot...

listen to your heart about your loved one...

take care..love Rosie

You are never alone. My boyfriend and I was having the same problem deciding what to do when we found out that his Mom had AD. We talked and prayed and prayed some more (together and in our own private time). She was living in an assisted living facility at the time (it was a good one and could handle her immediate needs just fine as she still have a lot of her capabilities), then her confusion started getting worse and depression set in. I took her to a DR and he suggested that we get her in to have her tested (after he ruled out other things that could be causing this). We did and sure enough they suspected that she was in the early middle stages of AD. During this time we also found out that she had been tested before several years prior to this and had been told that it looked like she had onset of AD (if we had only known, but I had just met her son at that time and she was living alone in another city). The day that we found out what was going on with his Mom, we decided to look for a house large enough for for him, his Mom, my 17 year old daughter and myself to live in. (The lease on his apartment was almost up). I put my house on the market, started looking for a house for all of us to be a family in. Gave notice to the ALF, talked to my boss about the possibility of doing my data entry work from home, stopped by my church's office and talked and prayed with the pastor. With in one week, I had an offer on my house I found a 5 bedroom house that was for lease in the town that we lived in with in 3 weeks I had all of us moved in (my boyfriend was out of the country at the time due to work, thats right he came home to a new house.. ha ha)That was 3 years ago and I have never for one minute regretted the choices that God led us to make. You have to do what you think is right for you and your family and trust that God will help you make the right decision.
You will be in my prayers as you travel your path. You are never alone!

I love James Taylor too by the way.. Is there anyone who doesn't?