I'm not sure if this was posted here, but this unfortunate overworked caregiver in my area made a fatal mistake this past week. He went to work and locked his parents (both over 70 w/AD)
in his car. His Dad passed away...

So, so, sad.. You can read it here..

http://www.poughkeepsiejournal.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20080708/NEWS05/807080324

BevP

Yes, I heard. The mother left the car and wandered off, too. My heart broke.

Very sad!No other comment since I don't know the whole situation.

The judge obviously does not understand the situation. He ordered the man to stay away from his mother; and when the man objected because he needed "to make sure she has food and other things she needs,” the judge said the only way the order of protection could be lifted is if the mother called the Westchester County District Attorney’s Office.

This is the mother with AD, mind you, who the judge expects to phone the DA's office.

And per a CNN report, the coroner put "homicide" on his report. Excuse me? An older man with AD dies of the heat because he doesn't realize he's too hot and does not get out of an unlocked car -- and this is a man who until last week was still physically fit enough to be out mowing the yard -- and that's homicide? How many older people WITHOUT dementia die of heat stroke every year, Because they don't realize that their bodies are getting overly heated?

Friends and neighbors say the accused was a loving and attentive son.

This is beginning to sound like the Ohio case.

Here is a more recent article:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/07/10/nyregion/10car.html?_r=1&oref=slogin

This son may have been loving and attentive, but....leaving his parents at a cafe for 6 hours straight, for 5 days in a row?? Leaving them in a car, with the windows(electric, by the way) up, on an 80 degree day?? Would any of us leave our LO in a car, for any reason, for over 3 hours, let alone to go to work??? This is very similar to parents leaving their children in cars, unattended. Unless this guy is "simple-minded", I see no excuse for this. Thank God, the Mother was able to get out.

Wow - I find it hard to believe sometimes that someone could "forget" their child was in the car...but how do you not see 2 heads in your rearview mirror sitting in the car? I don't know...

Monday, there was a 4-yr-old child "forgotten in a school bus for hours & it was 107'.

Wonder if any of these people were on their cell phones or iPods & that's why they "forgot"? And don't forget how many times the neighbor of a murderer will say he was "always so loving - such a nice man."

Creepy.

I agree, Becky,
Those school bus stories are horrific. How can any bus driver leave that bus, without checking????

Sadly, alot of school bus drivers dont check. Or think they know more than they do. My kindergartner was barely 5yrs old,when we moved, and the bus driver "decided on her own" to not take her to the appropriate stop that afternoon from school.

So my 5yr old wandered till nearly dark, and eventually got in a car with a stranger!(She was so fortunate, the lady who picked her up was a Girl Scout leader).

Thank God for the miracles that followed that child!, twice in a week, same bus driver! Once, the driver took her to a town 35 miles away and told her to get off the bus. My child refused. So authorities were alerted that the child was being "difficult". And the next week out had her get out at a diff stop.

As for a parent, or an adult child forgetting, something seems amiss there.

maebee, have you seen the man on TV the news? He does appear to be a little bit challenged IQ-wise.
The poor man appears to have been in way over his head, and struggling to do the best he knew how.

Thanks for the update article. (I found it very interesting that the authorities knew he was dropping his parents off at the cafe and that they both had dementia, and didn't do anything.)

Maebee,this is not about your posting rather the scripture from Hebrews you quote,as I was sitting on the deck this morning with my first cup of coffee,musing,that very verse popped into my head,I meditated on it for some time and thought of all the angels who have helped me along the way,they were many,some still here on earth some continuing the work of watching over me/us,I thank God for all my angels.God be in your hearts and understanding.
If God be for us, who can be against us.Rom.8:31

This quote from the New York Times article explains why Pressman changed his pattern and left his parents in the car instead of dropping them off at a restaurant: “Mr. Pressman dropped them off at 4 p.m. and did not return until 10, five days in a row — buying only one cup of coffee for them to share (even bringing in an empty McDonald’s cup to divide it up)....

“...Mr. Weber said that the police warned Mr. Pressman not to leave his parents there anymore, but he suggested that the police could have done more....
“The police could have prevented this if they had called social services,” he said. “They knew the guy had been dropping off his parents here when they clearly had dementia...”

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There is no justification the stupidity of Mr. Pressman’s decision. One cup of coffee being split between 2 parents could signal a lack of funds for hiring outside caregivers. The fact that the one solution he could think of to resolve his problem resulted in the police being called and no follow up or help being offered is an indication that our system is broken. Until time and money are spent educating, helping, and informing caregivers of community resources instead of reacting to their mistakes this scenario could occur again and again.

skericheri, you are SO right on target!!!

Oh gosh.. I hadn't read the NY Times article. That is so tragic. I wasn't certain if the caregiver had mental illness, or simply had snapped under the stress of trying to care for both of them..

Why didn't the police offer him some kind of counseling??