Hi, my husband is 64 and a victim of EOAD, he is in the moderate stage. He is starting to get easily irritated and agitated. I purchase a house across the street from our adult son so that I can feel a little more secure. I have not told my husband, and at some level I am afarid that when I do it will increase his agitation and he will refuse to move with me. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how I can make the move not stressful and have a good transition?

You might want to speak with his doctor about changing or adding medication that would help calm his agitation prior to the move.

For my MIL it is Seroquel that calmed her down and stopped the accusations, rants, and abuse about 85% of the time. There are other meds that work the same way but your husbands neurologist is the one to ask.

My other thought is to pack as much as you can out of his sight...maybe moving all the boxes into the garage or a room that is not used much. And on the day of the big move, have a friend take him out for the day so he doesn't have to witness all the activity. If you're down-sizing, don't ask him to make many choices regarding what to keep and what to give away. Of course this all depends on what stage he is in and how your relationship works...it's just a suggestion.

I don't envy you the big job ahead but you're wise to move now so you will have support in the future.

Peace

Nessa has excellent advice about taking your DH elsewhere the day of the move. When we moved MIL to ALF, she went ballistic until we could get her out of the house while the sons loaded furniture. When we got her into her new apt. at ALF she was fine. It was seeing her things leave her house that fired her up.

Welcome to the forum,,you will find so much great advice and support here, this is a fantastic forum.

I'm sorry about your husband to have this awful disease at such a young age,,really sorry for him,,and most importantly for you and your family.

I would absolutely call his Dr and speak with him about the possibility of some medications,,and also tell the Dr your plan on moving and why your'e moving. Cause that may motivate the Dr to truly understand how your husbands behavior actually is at this stage of the game.

I will assume that you and your son have talked in great depth about his helping you with his Dad,,should the time or situation arrive.

I guess you can tell your husband of your plans,,and be cheery about it,,but he will no doubt freak out a bit,,cause you are removing him from his comfort zone,as he knows it.

Just tell your husband some tender fibs,,,like how wonderful to live right across the street from your son,,you can see him all the time,,it will be like the old days,,except he will just be living right across the street.

I'm sure your husband was told of his diagnosis,,,wasn't he? If he is still able to a point to understand things,,maybe,,hopefully breaking the news to him won't be so bad.

Might even be a good idea to take him over to the new house to show it to him,,and try to make him feel that his input is also still important.

Best of luck to you ,,please come here again and keep us updated on things. Peace