I guess this is where I should post this. It's more about how I feel, than asking for advice.

A little background:
My mom has had AD for five years, gradually worsening to stage 6d at this point. When she could no longer live safely on her own, we moved her from her home 2 hours away to private ALF near me. We are so fortunate, because she was very frugal and saved enough money to pay for her care. She does have long term care insurance which would pay for a skilled nursing facility for five years. However, I don't want her there because she receives such wonderful personal care where she is now. It's private pay, and worth every penny. She saved her money for a rainy day, and it's not just raining, it's pouring AD!

My brother was always the "golden child", if you know what I mean. Tall, good-looking, ambitious and self-centered, for the most part. Though he was always able to "help" others when it made him look good, or there was something in it for him. Whenever he needed something, mom was there for him. If he needed a loan, she provided the money. If he needed help with a project, she was there helping him with it.

So where is he now that she needs him? He hasn't visited our mom in a year and a half. No reason he can't. It's about an hour-and-a-half drive. It's not a financial burden for him. He has the time if he wants to make the time. But he chooses not to. When I mentioned visitng her last year, he told me he'd already said his good-bye's to mom!
This makes me angry! His mom isn't dead, she just has Alzheimer's! She's not mean, she's not angry, she's gentle, and sweet, and polite. And has no memory.

Granted, she doesn't recognize him. How could she when he doesn't visit? Yet if I say his first name, she will smile and say his last name. She doesn't really recognize or remember any family members, and may not even know who I am. But she always likes it when I visit (which is every other day). She doesn't really participate in a conversation, but likes me to tell her about what goes on in my life, and her grandchildren's lives. I sit beside her on the sofa, and hold her hand. Sometimes I bring family photos for her to look at, though she hasn't a clue who anybody is. She mostly keeps her eyes closed, and listens. When I ask her if she'd rather I not talk, she says "no, I like the sound of your voice".

I simply cannot comprehend the fact that my brother's family doesn't visit!
I had been calling him or emailing updates on how she's doing. But, no more. If he wants to know how his mother is doing, he can call and talk to her caregiver.

Please don't misundertand. I love my brother, but sometimes I may not like him. I just wish he would treat his mom like she had always treated him.